43. (S2E7) Humor Is a Multi-Purpose Tool with Lisa David Olson

Today’s guest has been on my list of people to invite to the show for a long time. Lisa David Olson’s humor has kept me laughing on social media for a couple of years. She’s one of the reasons I’m still on Facebook at all. And as you’ll hear, she’s indirectly responsible for introducing me to two of this show’s past guests.

In fact, humor is the tool Lisa has used to get through her fine and less than fine life situations. I was eager to talk with her about this because it’s not a tool anyone else has mentioned before. We’re discussing humor as a deflector, a connector, and an escape. And we’re chatting about beliefs around working hard, pretending everything in your life is normal, and reaching out to people when you think of them, just because.

Lisa David Olson is a keynote speaker, podcaster, business humorist, speaker trainer and embarrassing mom. She had two TEDx Talks released last year, proving the pandemic did have its happy moments.

Whether in-person or online, she delivers high-energy presentations that challenge attendees to think creatively and choose the lighter side of life.

Learn about Lisa’s ‘Project in Bravery’, her comedy album, book and journal at www.LisaDavidOlson.com

Lisa’s hype song comes from the band Cake, “The Distance”

Connect with Lisa at http://linkedin.com/in/lisa-david-olson-80376612

https://www.facebook.com/lisa.olson.improv.buddy       

https://instagram.com/lisadavidolson

Join her Counter Clockwise Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/715435915851993

If you enjoy this show, please tell 3 other people about it. It’s about building connection and community. We need that now more than ever.

When you’re ready to add a bit more peace and groundedness to your life, I can help. Pop over the ZenRabbit.com webpage and sign up for my VIP list. That way you’ll be the first to get all the tools and tips on finding calm amidst the chaos of life.

Transcript

0:00:01.2 LORI SAITZ: Hello and welcome to fine is a four-letter word. My guest today is the infamous famous infamous Leavitt. Welcome, thanks for Ham and me lady. I am so honored to have you on my show because I don't know, we've known each other for a while through social media primarily, and you have been indirectly responsible for a couple of the other guests we've had on... Fine is a four-letter word. With episode four, I had Eve Mason, and her episode was called prostitutes, pain and power, you were... We were in Facebook Facebook group together that you had invited me into that group, that's how I met Eve, so you were somewhat responsible for that, and then Episode 28, he healed through gratitude with Jennifer Garman.

0:00:57.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: Said some powerful guest on a great podcast, I'm so glad and I did get to hear the one with Eve, and I'm definitely gonna check out the mom with Jennifer, and I love the show and just how open it is, you really are spreading the word around, and I like that because it's a comfortable place to just really talk.

0:01:15.4 LORI SAITZ: Well, yeah, well, and we're gonna talk a little bit about your podcast as well because I'm a huge fan, but we'll get to that in a minute. Let's start with the question of what were the values and beliefs that you were raised with that influenced you as you grew up?

0:01:34.5 LISA DAVID OLSON: I think my values that I was raised with, and the guidance was basically, don't do what we're doing, that's the kind of household I grew up in, the...

0:01:46.4 LORI SAITZ: Do as we say, not as we do.

0:01:48.9 LISA DAVID OLSON: They weren't really... They weren't really around... No helicopters in my parents. That's for sure. So no, it was a different time. And it was... My mother was an alcoholic who was a functioning alcoholic, and as I got older, I understood that she was self-medicating, whatever her mental issues might have been, but as a kid, you don't know that, you just know I can't have friends over, 'cause stuff could happen in the night... So she would often grab us out of bed and have us clean, scrub the toilets or dig through the garbage, we threw away the mushroom, is that kind of stuff. And then the next day, a McDonald's in presence. Oh, I have a beaneaters. I don't think we have any babies back then, but it was more like that, so it was definitely the highs and lows, and my dad is awesome and kind and gentle, but he was... Somehow he was just never there when that was happening, when he was in his den or left the hall, it was a very weird time. So basically, I learned what not to do, actually, and I just never, ever, ever treated my own children that way.

0:02:56.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: If that's my legacy, I did. Okay.

0:02:59.0 LORI SAITZ: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I would imagine so. So self-reliance was something that you love.

0:03:08.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: That's for certain. I left home at 17. I was out of there. 10th grade, I left school, left home, never went back to either... Well, I did go back to school, but not that school, I never went back. My oldest sister was 19, got pregnant, then married to a man that had three kids, so at 19 she was a mother for no washer and dryer a, and then she had a second one right away, so it was... My next brother older than me did a lot of hiding and they both were morbidly obese, and I had eating disorder the other way, and then the youngest of us for... Was pretty much a baby. And really, he doesn't remember all that stuff, I don't think he was pulled out of bed or anything like that, so we are not close as a family whatsoever, we all just... It was surviving whatever you can do to survive and... Just make it another day.

0:04:04.6 LORI SAITZ: Wow. Wow, okay. So you escaped... We'll say escape at 17. And where did you go... And what happened.

0:04:13.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: I got an apartment, my older brother did end up sharing an apartment with me, we were so broke, we would have like 10... For the week I was working, I would take a bus and go clean hotel rooms, and I didn't drive at that point yet, and I just remember we would make a hot dish and then just keep adding stuff to it through the week, it would end up just being like, noodles, some tomato sauce. Here's corn. Here's peas, whatever. So I just remember us being extremely broke and we actually were happy though, and we knew in the moment that these are the days we're gonna look back at and say, Yeah, that sucked. But we did it, we survived, at least we're happy, and it was a tough time, but I look back at that as feelings, I felt safe. That's

0:04:56.9 LORI SAITZ: Pretty dang important. Wow, is that a... Yes, that extremely important, especially given that Viet, you are coming from.

0:05:04.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: It meant to everything, I knew my brother cared about me and that he was protecting me, and I could sleep through the night and not worry me, I still have night rides, but I can talk myself through it, I kinda get logical about it.

0:05:17.7 LORI SAITZ: And how long were you in it? And how long were you the one-to-one...

0:05:20.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: And I think we lived together maybe a year, and then I ended up in another apartment with a girlfriend, and then met my first husband to be... And from there, have always been married, but not to the same guy, I'm on my third...

0:05:36.1 LORI SAITZ: Like wearing them out. Well, you know, it's hard to keep up with somebody who's a hesitation that... Right. Wow. Okay, wow. Okay, so how did your adult life progress... I kinda had to read A... You kinda had to raise yourself work... How did it work when you were then an adult, like did you have the tools you need to

0:06:10.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: Have always been a worker, and I've always gone toward older people, and so I've just never not worked. I've almost always had two jobs, so I just... I don't know where that came from, but my sons have that as well, that work means something in that you work and that's your character and downtime... Yes. But is your work done? And that's a fault of mine, but I've just always worked and just wanted to be a survivor, and I think that is just from... I can do this, I got this. And just making it work. So at least I have that in me and... Well, when I think about it right now, my mother always was working, like I said, she was a functioning alcoholic, I don't remember her missing work, and I don't know how... I don't know how, because she had some wild nights, some things happened.

0:07:00.6 LORI SAITZ: So obviously, obviously you got that value maybe of her works and... So hard work is a set

0:07:09.1 LISA DAVID OLSON: Or hard work is this... Or does it define you? That's not healthy. But that's what it is. That's what it was. I'm still a hard worker.

0:07:17.5 LORI SAITZ: Yeah, a lot of people, for sure. Right, right. A lot of people to find themselves by their ability to work... All

0:07:24.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: Right, I'm with you there.

0:07:26.5 LORI SAITZ: Yeah, yeah. Right. Sometimes to their detriment, there's nothing wrong with working hard. That's an admirable trait. And at the same time, so many times we find ourselves, we define ourselves by our work or maybe don't allow ourselves to have fun because... Well, I just have to work. Yes, a friend of mine.

0:07:50.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: I just was putting in, that's some training over in Sweden from... I think he's in Ohio and he's over in Sweden training, and he said, Wow. I think I'm getting used to this culture where he was definitely was more into the breaks, the sustenance, the relaxation time, and the downtime and self-care, he just said, they don't work or work these crazy hours, and he said, they're happier, they're healthier.

0:08:24.0 LORI SAITZ: That's a bear. That's a very European thing. They think Americans are seen and sometimes I think Americans are insane when he... Attention, then I look at it, I'm one of them... Here we are in the Americas, not just one of the Americans, one of the Americans who works hard and Danielle necessarily take the breaks that... I know I should. Yeah, what you... Yeah, what do you do when you're not in pain? What do you allow you to... What do you allow yourself now

0:08:55.5 LISA DAVID OLSON: Hooked on yoga and painting in writing. So I'm constantly going in a podcast, but writing can sometimes met a few bucks, which feels good, or an award, we all like stickers and painting, I've sold, so I give some as gifts, I usually don't give too many as gifts because I don't wanna force my art on anyone, but I just started painting last year 'cause both my boys draw and I was like, Well, maybe I should try something, and it turns out I really like it because if you screw it up, it's a learning and you can paint over it, man. Do Over that favorite key on the keyboard for me, and do over

0:09:36.0 LORI SAITZ: With painting, that's what I can do. And I listen to crime podcast while I paint.

0:09:39.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: And my husband said, You have the most beautiful scenes, these flowers, these trees, the reflection in the water, and you're listening to people being stabbed in all these things, and I'm like, Well, balance baby.

0:09:54.7 LORI SAITZ: Exactly. What kind of painting are you doing, is it water colors to a T... What do you...

0:09:59.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: Toiletries, flowers, I'm saying the word sum, so me... And a lot of times I'm doing resin art, so I have flowers from my actual garden and then I coin resident and I have this perpetual garden. Wow, I've done very... I also like abstract because it's very hard to do because... When are you done? Ossi, with my mind sometimes, or you might find a dog, Paul in there, whatever... We do have a dog, otherwise, that would be really strange.

0:10:41.0 LORI SAITZ: Off the street. Yeah, I know you have one. Yeah, you have much... And he makes a lot of references on social media, I was... As I was asking about the painting, because for my birthday, my friend Tracy and I went to one of those painting at bars and paid 50 to paint a picture, I... I liked it so much, but I don't wanna have to pay 50 every time. I just wanna pick up a paint brush. So I was like, Wow, I've never really done it before. I didn't know I had a... An interest in doing it. Well, and that's fine.

0:11:17.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: Probably if it was at a bar, you had some liquid courage in you and you let your guard down, you said, Why the heck... No.

0:11:23.6 LORI SAITZ: I actually do. I actually didn't have any alcohol that night. Tracy had some hot chocolate, but we did in true entrepreneurial style, so they lead you through a specific picture that there's somebody painting, they have to... They have the colors, they already have the color palette paint in front, late for you, and it was like... Yeah, and it was like green and lose, and some purple with... And Tracy and I go in there and we're like, Can we have some pink? How about some orange? Can I have some orange? My picture of General sample is a general semblance of what they were painting, but it is... No, that's awesome. That's what it's all about. Yeager, your own thing.

0:12:07.5 LISA DAVID OLSON: I see your greens and blues, but I'm feeling pain today. So here's an extra five. Let's find the pay.

0:12:13.3 LORI SAITZ: That's right. That's right. We didn't even have to pay a atelier... Happy to make you happy. To make you happy. So yeah, so Since it is called fine is a four-letter word, tell me your story of being stuck in a place where everything was fine, or everything you said everything was fine, but

0:12:24.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: all that just goes right back to the childhood issues where you had to pretend with your friends that you had a normal household, but you couldn't invite anybody over, you couldn't have overnight, that kind of thing, 'cause you never knew, so I could kind of pretend, and that's where humour comes into play and distraction... Look over there. Hey, I'm funny, I'm cute. And then the first marriage, you try and make it work, you got a couple of kids and it wasn't fun, but you're married and you're helping them run a karate studio, so you don't wanna mess everything up and all those things, but eventually it wasn't... And we were still living together, but separated, and it was just horrible, but we found our way through and we did divorce and we were very, very close, very good friends, and my husband, TAD, knows and respects my first husband as well, and so, hey, I need help move in the shaman. Okay, come on over.

0:13:30.1 LISA DAVID OLSON: So when you have an X, always be friendly, you just never know when you need a heavy stuff moved. And I think that's important, right? But I'm honestly there for him to ethnicity social media, and I'm always rallying for it, like he's about to do a Polar Plunge in the Mississippi in the middle of winter to raise money for Special Olympics, and I'm like, Hey, everybody helped chip in and... 'cause he doesn't like to go look at me, help me, so we're on board with that, and at least my boys know that part and how that can work, we can all be together for dinner, so I did act like it was fine until... I just couldn't anymore. And that was hard. That was hard, right

0:14:07.1 LORI SAITZ: Party. It is hard, and I think that's also the reason why my program is called Fuck being fine, you just reach a point where you're like, I cannot do this one more day, it is, and it fits in to the... In physically...

0:14:23.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: And that's when you know that, could I go back to what I was doing to then... Maybe change is what you need. I mean, I guess it goes back to when I was 17 and I took off. It was a bottom bottom line, but you're so scared of the unknown, but you know what else is scary, the known and staying in the known. That's not good.

0:14:44.3 LORI SAITZ: It's not good, but at... It's not good, but a lot of people do it because it is known, it's more content. It's more comfortable, let's say. Then that's when I do physical it, it's uncomfortable, but it's... Right. And I like a lot. Yeah, physical, psychological, emotional. All these things we utter trying to shove down, come out, event's gonna come out of somewhere.

0:15:08.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: Absolutely, right. And that's hard, 'cause we could have even better and not really know what they're dealing with. I don't find that social media is ostinato, do it. I don't respect that. I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna see on Facebook. How sad you are. Just call me... One of the things I'm very proud of as a friend, I reach out to people when I think of them, I'll text them or Facebook message and just say, I thought of you and I just smiled, and I hope your day is great. And I mean it, if I think of you and I send you that note... Who wouldn't want that? You're not asking me for anything. I don't need to answer it. I can if I want, and maybe if I am having a crappy day, maybe I'll say I need it, and that is when I get 90% of the time, which is a made up state is the response I needed that just then...

0:15:58.0 LORI SAITZ: Do you a yes, because you are tapping into some kind of intuition that that person needed to hear from you, I've heard that from other people that they do that something similar, and they get the same kind of response like, and you don't know how much I need to do it to me that it was cool, you didn't need anything to... But I eateries more that came across your brain.

0:16:18.6 LISA DAVID OLSON: That's kind of... Well.

0:16:21.9 LORI SAITZ: Yes, yes, yes, I love that. One of the tools that you have used to, with things being fine or less than fine, something that we have not... Is something that we have not talked about on this show, 'cause I'm always asking, So what tools did you use to move... Is about my creaking? And your street, your street? I don't know.

0:16:44.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: Do I just wondered? We want viewership.

0:16:49.4 LORI SAITZ: We want to hear that or inertia, talk about streaking in the winter, and in the winter, I contacted me about What... Yeah, no, tell me about what the tools are that you have used in dealing with situations that we were... Syllables

0:17:12.1 LISA DAVID OLSON: Humor. Humor, humor. Humor, it's my deflector. It covers when I don't know the answer. I just gave a presentation today and I was just open about it, I said, humor is my coping mechanism, it's one that I'm busted on all the time, I had a therapist say, You know, you don't always have to entertain me, and I've even had a physician say that... Do you think you have to be funny all the time, like Damn. Some people pay for this. What are you talking about? I'm paying you, you will laugh, but it is the reflection of it, I learned early on, and as a kid, I used to pretend that Carol Burnett was raising me, and I knew that she had alcoholic parents and her grandma was taking care of her, and I was like She understands me and Harvey Korman and Tim come, or my uncles, and I live with her and all these things, and it was just... It meant the world to me to be in her world. Even though she didn't have a clue who I am. We have been in the same room once. I saw her in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Never got picked to ask a question doing it, but

0:18:17.5 LORI SAITZ: We breathe the same air one night about four years ago, now is a good a... Now is a good time to mention 'cause you never know who's listening is a six degrees of separation, that if you had one person in the entire universe to me.

0:18:32.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: He would be Lisa, my other mother, Carol Burnett. And that is almost what I named my book was I was raised by Carver net, that was gonna be the name.

0:18:40.9 LORI SAITZ: And my God, yeah, is gonna be... And

0:18:45.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: Carol, I know you listen to this show, I just want you on my podcast, I would only take 10 minutes... That's a lie. I would stretch it out, all I need is 10 minutes, just a quick call, just... That's it, just so I can tell you how much you mean to me. And will be good. So

0:19:02.0 LORI SAITZ: Now we at a... You had to... Don't you think if you had named your book that, that she would have...

0:19:07.6 LISA DAVID OLSON: It would have gone... Mitanni could have been sued probably, so there's a whole chapter about her, but it's certainly not the name of it, because what if I got sued that would not be neat. I don't know.

0:19:21.2 LORI SAITZ: Were you think or maybe using an... That was raised by her. I doubt that she needs them to talk about taking risks, I intuit, 'cause if

0:19:32.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: I did get well, I can still write another book, but

0:19:34.5 LORI SAITZ: You could... You could re-issue it

0:19:38.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: Would... Publicity is publicity. Sure, I got sued, but I'm famous and

0:19:43.4 LORI SAITZ: I got to me or in court. Alright, that's right. Alright, well, maybe we don't wanna eat by Carl Burnet, but you do wanna meet her, so

0:19:56.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: We're pruning out to the asset, will send the prize is to... Whoever can make that connection.

0:20:01.5 LORI SAITZ: Alright, alright, we got that. It's interesting that you say that humor is your... Your coping mechanism, because like I said, we haven't had somebody talking about... We've talked about using gratitude and meditation and EFT tapping and all these other great tools for moving past being stuck in a place where everything was fine or less in fine, but humor is also such an important tool and not everyone... Not everybody can use it as

0:20:36.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: A... I guess it doesn't suit everything, now, the puns that I have a passion for do not suit my husband, he acts very upset. I could pun you about cheese for five minutes... You know, that's a good one. Is that chatter? Oh, great. But I won't... Humor is a connector and it raises our endorphins and it lowers our blood pressure, so that is so damn fine. Affordable Health Care, and it also in the moment, if you and I were in the grocery store and we had a cheat, a quick chitty chat about on those oranges, I didn't even see though it was Pablo and we've connected, maybe we make a joke or somebody walks through and says, Let me juggle though, is we're gonna laugh and in the next interaction to the cashier and whatever is joy, there's this ripple effect of joy, and that is what's so important about humor, and we need more punch lines and less headlines... More punch lines, less headlines, especially before bed, especially upon waking, look up that old show you love and look at bloopers, I have just a joy for bloopers, and on my podcast, every episode, we talk about a dare or a prank that my guest has done or had done to them or knows up because I had a passion for pranks, and I work with cops in the day.

0:22:02.8 LORI SAITZ: I love that you ask you... I love that you ask your guest that, is there one... Since you brought it up, is there somebody who stands out in your mind or something they said that they ranked somebody or that they have a ton, is

0:22:18.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: I could talk to an author about something and we're talking about the subject to their book and all my guests are unique? Weirdos, stranger. Strange in the best possible way. And then when you ask, dear or praying, we almost always go back to younger self, which is sad 'cause you should still be ranking, but in a nice way, of course not the mean things, but it's so fun to see that flip in their personality and their storytelling and I'm majorly in the story telling, one of them was this really serene guy, Richard Matthews, he's very high intelligent... Lives in an RV with four, 20 kids, and his wife. I'm like, You go, boy, and his history for a... To me, anything over two is a lot, now they've got four kids, and if they should have more, they'll have more, you said. And they're in an RV, so for 20 doesn't matter, does it? And Joannes, very, very intelligent and just, they're homeschooling and they're traveling, and the kids are standing in historical places instead of reading about it. Pretty interesting, and the way that they have to live is so, so different, but then you talk about Der pranks and who it all flipped, and he's talking about in college how the doors to the dorms were in swinging, and two guys would go to somebody else's dorm one would knock and the other one would be naked and doing a handstand, and you can figure out the visual when you open the door.

0:23:53.9 LISA DAVID OLSON: They called it flying, and I'm not 100% on that.

0:23:58.0 LORI SAITZ: But

0:23:58.4 LISA DAVID OLSON: That's one I didn't see common noted. The former person... Well, there was a female, and right now, I'm not thinking of a desk, but she was telling me that she and her dad were sitting on the porch, I think she and her brother and her dad was sitting on the front porch and a car pulled up and grab a girl off the sidewalk, dad jumped up over the porch like a Superman, she'd never seen a move like that, and ran toward the car and grabbed the person before that car had the person in the car, and I guess the car was actually printing anybody that was looking here, making it look like an abduction... Dad was having none of that. And when she tells it, it's so much more colorful, but to just think about sitting here with your dad and all of a sudden he just become Superman and flies over the porch wall and actually apprehension, you think of these different things, it... It's not a friendly prank, but it was one that stuck out in my head.

0:24:56.0 LORI SAITZ: Definitely, again, definitely a good visual for sure. Yeah, yeah, for those of you who are listening right now, Lisa's podcast is called Stranger connections. And I'll put a link in the sheets... Well, I've been... I've been a fan for a long time. In fact, I was listening to your podcast with a sermon...

0:25:15.1 LISA DAVID OLSON: That means a lot. Thank you.

0:25:17.0 LORI SAITZ: Yeah. Yeah. Cool. Okay, well, where are we going from here to Ottawa talking about a... This part.

0:25:30.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: I'll say something else about humor, so when you think about comics, so many of them really are dark and humor is their outside face, you think about Robin Williams, and that always comes to mind for me. Or you hear things about, I don't know, Jim Carrey or something. When they're being characters, when you're being a character... 'cause I'm an actress as well. I had a comedy Troup for 20 years. When you're a character, you can do what you want, you don't have to be you, you don't have to answer to the people in your circle, and so that's why it's such a great escape for a lot of people, so generally, I'm gonna say performers are generally trying not to be themselves for a good two hours while they get to be on stage, so a lot of times that's what humor can be as a veil or a mask and applause. Yeah, and then people are so surprised to find out the real person behind it, and you may never find out that person... I've hosted a lot of stand-up comedy, and the person on the stage is a persona, you think You know that person on stage and that's a great performer.

0:26:43.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: And then behind the scenes, if you were the one I'm seeing them and you're in the green room with them, they might not even want to speak to them or look at them or anything, because they have to get into that zone, but that's just their stage persona that's certainly not that person... It sounds like, Oh, my wife and, Oh, my kid did this. I'm sorry. That's all data. And I can't say 100% of them, but there's a reason people want to be a different character or want to make you laugh because applies his approval after his acceptance, that's what I always say for myself.

0:27:20.8 LORI SAITZ: You have to... You have experience with improves as well, tell us a little bit, but tell us a little bit about how somebody would use improv to improve their level of success, whether that was in business or

0:27:36.6 LISA DAVID OLSON: In a... Love that question, Laurie. Love it, 'cause that's when I teach corporate, is improv for every day or for real life, and it is a way to think about a scene and I... Just today, I was in a workshop and I was teaching and I said, Who else has done in Pro nobody? And I said, Just raise your hand if any of this aligns with you, does anyone have a partner? Does anyone have a boss, does anyone have a kid, it doesn't even have a sibling, 'cause anyone to have a roommate, we all do in profit just doesn't mean that it means you're not on the stage in a spotlight style, but we are all improvising... Look at the last two years. Oh my gosh, we're got your quarantine for two weeks... I'll never be able to do that. Well, guess what, you did. So whether you did it gracefully or no, you did it, 'cause you're here and you're listening, but imposes world would be thinking about the scene, Laurie and I are in a scene and we ask the audience, give me a place where two people might meet somebody else out a clinic lobby.

0:28:46.1 LISA DAVID OLSON: And now Lauren, I get on there and if I say to Laurie, Oh, this movie theater is so amazing, and if Laura said, We're not in a movie theater, Posen has done the end... That's called a road block. So now I'll go backwards. We're both in the clinic lobby and we just were told that I step up... I do look at the movie theater, it's so amazing. And Lourdes wasn't that brilliant that they put that here at the clinic... Boom, now we're going forward, she just did the Yes and... And that's what... Yes, and is... And you can use that in business, when your boss says something, don't talk back, don't bring your boss a problem, bring them an idea for what you think could work, don't go... You know what, this copier is like a piece of crap and it never works, or you call the company and say, Hey, is this under warranty, I just wanted to talk to my boss about possibly replacing it. You go to the boss, you say, You know, I've noticed that this is bad, but I found out we can do this. Yes, that is what you do.

0:29:46.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: That's how it works for business, it also is about listening, so if your partner blocks you in a scene, they're not listening to you, or building on what you said, that works at work, it works in relationships, whether it's your kid or your partner, whatever, build on what they said, Let them know they were heard, and it also builds trust along the way, that's my short version of how that works in real life.

0:30:10.9 LORI SAITZ: Yeah, it was just on the... Yeah, I was just on a training, small sales training call, I guess is the best way to describe it, as earlier this week, and we were talking about the same... Yes, saying Yes to more on a lot of people say yes to everything, and that's a different issue, or feeling over-filling your plate and saying Yes and not having boundaries and saying not being able to say no, but this was more about our initial response as humans is to say no. Somebody asks you a question or ask you to come do something with me. No, no, I'm busy. No, I don't have time or... Our first response is typically a no, because I don't know what I'm getting into, and the person who was teaching it was encouraging us to say yes to the opportunity... Yes, and... 'cause we were talking about improv, interestingly enough, how you do that in improves also a way to...

0:31:17.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: And you don't have to say those attributes, it's a mindset, and I work with... Every Spring, it's just so darn fun, it's fifth and sixth graders that get to come to the college in our town, and they're the gifted students, and so their celebration is a whole day of choosing different rooms to go to, one is the news casters and another one they're gonna Wall Climb, makes lime come to improve, call it improve station, and it's just so fun to play with them and see what they can build from it and learn from that as well, and just thinking that way is so fun and not saying No or road blocking, and it works for adults as well, it just doesn't even matter the ages of it, and that's the best part because it's... Stating that you go with the idea. So I like that you said that too. And it is, and you don't have to say yes to everything, but you can build off what somebody says because we all wanna be heard it... Right.

0:32:15.6 LORI SAITZ: Right. Using this in meetings, instead of shutting somebody down, now that's a dumb idea, even if you don't say it in the one language can be quite loud. Yeah, being open to seeing where... At least open to pop, open to possibilities. Really, that's what we're talking about on the show a lot, is being open to possibilities and where to play with...

0:32:41.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: Yes, and is such a way to explore and play, and when I get to hang out with the fifth and sixth graders, and my only rule is let's not make everything a butt joke because I've learned that early on... Parts are funny, I'll be honest, but I just don't want them to come away with, Oh, we just did a whole scene of part mom that was great with that one lady, so no, we don't wanna do that. But it's just that's the reputation you want to allow yourself to explore and play and get down on the floor instead of sitting at your desk, take your lab talk into a different room. Do you need quiet? When's the last time you took a walk without your buds, when the last time you drove in silence to hear your own thoughts and... Move the room you're in. Move the scent. Let's talk about sent. Sound feel taste. I drink hot water, sometimes I'll throw a lime in there or something, change stuff. Some people need to be in a loud coffee house, and that's where I did a lot of comedy writing. I don't know what it was about, grabbing my laptop and going to a coffee house, but the chatter, and there's even one of the music channels or insure, you can find it, coffeehouse sounds where it's not just coffee house in music, but also the sounds of the Dell chatter and linking of cups and stuff, and sometimes...

0:34:08.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: Yeah, I've heard. That's so cool. So if that's what you need, it changes your energy. That's just great. Yeah.

0:34:18.3 LORI SAITZ: So I was changing the scene, changing the scene of where you are, especially as so many people now are working from home or Chitose in the same four walls, and now that we can get out a little bit more going to a coffee house or going to a park, if you live in a place where it's not the below zero right now to mine

0:34:39.6 LISA DAVID OLSON: Has a coffee at, he goes to the drive-through every day, and he goes and sits in a park every day, any posts every day. What song he's listening to and what he's thinking about, and that's comforting for him, he gets out of his house to go do that, and it has become his routine, and I always look forward to his post because I'm just... I don't know why that settles me, it's just like, Oh, there is

0:35:04.2 LORI SAITZ: A... Cool, that's cool. And coming back to the whole idea of Play, which is a topic that we've talked about on the show before, about how your leeward difficult it is for a lot of people to find something that's fun, like what is fun for me anymore? Or what would be playful, what could be something that I could do that is playful, 'cause we are humans or animals and animals need to play, but we don't allow it because in part coming back to the whole... Coming back to the whole... Were talking about the beginning about being responsible and being hard working, but also because we just don't know anymore, 'cause we spend so much time, we're overcoming that by working hard. What is fine? What would be playful? Yeah, and you've got... You just talked about several things, you're painting and the improv, the comedy, all the fun things that you're doing, you do is laugh at 12 times a day their belly LA true belly laugh, and as we get older, we belly laugh less and less because...

0:36:14.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: No. Two fingers? No, no, that means to... No, or it could be bunny ears, it could be chopsticks, it could be your plug, it could be your nose plugs, it could be anything... No teacher said that means too. Well, it could be in peace, it could be... And as we're put in columns or nothing against teachers, but I'm just saying as reporting to use silos a brain, you lose that ability for imagination, it becomes... Well, that's not very mature. Oh, the hell I say, because you have to have that. I'm going to jump out of an airplane at some point, so that's on my list of things that I need to explore, I need to find out, and we need that, we crave that just to make things different, and something I did early on with the pandemic, going to the store, for many of us was our only social... I was so afraid. Not physically shaking, afraid. But I thought, what if grocery stores close? What are we gonna do? I watch The Walking Dead. This doesn't turn out well. And so the grocery store was my big social moment. And in line at the store, I did not say, How are you? To the cashier.

0:37:28.2 LISA DAVID OLSON: I said, So what are you... For fun. And I'll be damned was that the most joy that would come because... What are you doing for fun? And this guy at the Whole Foods kind of store, dreadlocks, the dude was like 62, and then with his hair, it was 66, just a massive pilot, tied it shirt, he bends down and he looks at me and he goes... I have foster kittens at home. Do you wanna see a... A website is fun. It was adorable. And now I still see him. It's my regular store. And I'll say, How many kites do you have? And stuff like that. We made a human connection. Another girl said, I said, What are you doing for fun? I mean, they look at you kind of weird, and the conversation that came out of that was so much more than... Did you find everything? Yes, you could. How are you good? I'm not good, dammit, but I don't wanna talk about it either, and this girl told me about her dance and how even with masks, they could still meet safely and they were gonna put on a performance and she was thrilled.

0:38:32.0 LISA DAVID OLSON: I asked her about it a week or two later, had the show goal, it meant the world to her so much different than your good... I'm good to

0:38:42.4 LORI SAITZ: A... I love that you asked that. I love that you ask that. And at the same time, I'm thinking in my head, yeah, but you live in the Midwest, and how would you... Where in the Mid Atlantic or the Northeast, people be like, and you maybe not go on a alienate... I'll try it next time I go. I'm thinking in my head, I intransigence to do that, 'cause those people are more social or aetius ask somebody, What are you doing for fun?

0:39:12.8 LISA DAVID OLSON: And it takes them off guard a second, and they'll usually tell you, I've never had anyone mad at me, you're right. I'm in Minnesota, Wisconsin, right there, but I've asked it to other places as well, so I've been outside the mid-last you...

0:39:28.9 LORI SAITZ: I'm not saying you haven't been outside, I'm just saying, in general.

0:39:32.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: You made westerners or work or more foreign... A brief stay there. And it's just my thing. 'cause it is good. So you'll be surprised. So I expect a report back.

0:39:45.2 LORI SAITZ: Alright, get on. So now we're on the top Goethe topic of fun, betel me the song that you listen to when you need to get hypothetical of a... I don't know all the words. Do I have to know all the words... No, I'm not gonna ask.

0:40:05.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: No, I'm not gonna ask you to sing in a total... We don't know all the words, but I get hope when I hear the band cake and specifically... Or the way I like to say it specifically, just so people... Correct me specifically, I enjoy going the distance or I think it's just called bug distance, and it's so cool, and if you listen one time listen to the horn, listen again, listen to the baseline, another time listen to the SAR, 'cause he's kind of just speaking it, it's crazy. I love cake.

0:40:36.3 LORI SAITZ: I love Kat, I Love Canal kind of cat. But I love the band cake, and it's funny that you say specifically, because they are from the... They are... Do you know where they're from? They're from Sacramento, California. As you're the Pacific on the... Sacramento was not on the water. But it is, it is. Yes, it is a team. That's cool. Yeah. What's your son? I have two sons, I have two songs, one is Carrie Underwood, a champion, a good one, and other one is in and the other one is Van Halen, so...

0:41:14.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: Okay, yeah, that's a really good one.

0:41:17.9 LORI SAITZ: Yeah, but I love that you said that, but I love that you said Take... Because I'm a fan, I'm a big fan. I actually saw them in concert when I was living in Sacramento back in 1990, I wanna say... Yeah, in a small venue. And I used to listen to... I have a couple of these.

0:41:38.7 LISA DAVID OLSON: Are you talking vinyl girlfriend

0:41:40.5 LORI SAITZ: Is so good. No, I have a digital to now. I have one digital now, and actually I never had them digital, I had the mods, but now... Yeah, they have. They even read it. I won't survive it.

0:41:51.9 LISA DAVID OLSON: Yeah. There's some great songs, eHealth.

0:41:57.5 LORI SAITZ: I'm gonna put a link to that in the show notes as I always do, and I already said I'm gonna put a link to your podcast. Where else can people find you if they wanna continue? What commentator?

0:42:07.3 LISA DAVID OLSON: Lisa David Olson, O-L-S-O-N. And I also have the Facebook group, counter clock-wise. It's all humor. Please join us. I've had it a little over a year, Wetherill in that place because people want to let me eat only had it a year, it's 4000 because we all wanna laugh and... Yeah, join us over there. And I'm on Instagram, and if you give a crap about my art, let me know I have an Instagram page for that as well too.

0:42:37.6 LORI SAITZ: Thank you so much for joining me today. I'm fine as a...

0:42:42.9 LISA DAVID OLSON: Fortunate, I really appreciate your time.

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